No mas escuela!

I really should have been an English major. The subject comes so easily to me. I can get an A with minimal effort. Oh well. Instead, I chose the subjects that I thought I enjoyed: journalism and political science. I've grown to detest both of them now. Then again, everyone I've ever spoken to who has graduated from college says that there's something wrong if I don't hate my major by the time I'm a junior/senior.

I've also reached the conclusion that college is nothing but a 4+ year anxiety attack. I get panicked so easily when it comes to tests, papers, etc. I never used to be like that. As long as I got at least a B, I was fine. Now, I feel like I need to get that A, and if I don't, I might as well drop out of school, because I've basically failed. I have only a year and a half until I (hopefully!) graduate, and I'm really starting to panic. I feel as though my grades aren't good enough, and I'll never be able to bring them up, regardless of how hard I try.

There's also the question of what I'm going to do after I graduate. Honestly, I really don't know. I don't really want to work for a newspaper, there isn't much to do with political science, unless I go to grad school. The idea of the future scares the hell out of me. I like to joke that I will just continue to go to school for the rest of my life, just because I don't know what else to do.

I also think that I don't like writing as much as I thought that I did. I would much rather take pictures to tell the story of whatever I feel like saying or doing. When it comes to the things that happen in my life, it's easier to show someone than it is to tell.

Tomorrow I leave for Kansas City. I'm not really sure what I'm going to do there, but it will be nice to take a break from the insanity that is my life. I'm going with Andrew, his sister Amanda, and Thompson. The purpose of the trip is for a country music concert, but I'm not going to that. It should be interesting. I'll post photos when I get back.